He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
