Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables

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(204): View more from Manitoba

Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.

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(816): View more from Missouri

why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."

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(707): View more from California

Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?

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(630): View more from Illinois

I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..

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(512): View more from Texas

Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.

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