ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
