I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
