i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
