Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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