Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
