Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
