They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize