You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize