It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
