3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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