just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
