NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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