Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
