what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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