drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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