Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
