thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
