I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
