found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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