thus making me awesome and them whores
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
