Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Randomize
