My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
