did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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