my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
