You really coming over, don't trick.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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