You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
