Kiss
Puke
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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