I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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