what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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