Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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