As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
