you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
