Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize