I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
