Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize