i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
