WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
