Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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