it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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