I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Small penises have feelings too.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Randomize
