i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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