apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
