It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
