best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
