im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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