Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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