You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
tell me about the eggs
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