I feel like I'm in dance class right now
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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