It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Randomize
