um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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